To the judgemental parent or grandparent

As when I wrote to “the irritable parent” in the August issue of Evangelicals Now, do note that I am speaking to myself with this topic as much as to anybody else.

I don’t think there’s anything quite like parenting to make us compare ourselves to others, what with the specific stages and milestones and the way we are often in close proximity with other parents. There are so many decisions we each have to make, too: about screens, snacks, discipline. Parenting is visible. Which can lead us to being judgemental.

Now, we all need to make judgements: this is a safe practice but that is not; that parent looks like they need help; I see what they’re doing and I’d like to emulate that. And there is a sense in which we do need to judge our children, too: I judge that you could do with some extra maths help, I judge that you are persistently struggling with this situation.