Leadership is not control, but love – John Benton

Male church leadership is under attack from several directions, particularly because of glaring examples of men whose leadership has been abusive. In churches that take a complementarian view of church leadership, how do we prevent these abuses? We need to think of male leadership in church as father-like, writes Jim Sayers.

John Benton from Aylesbury explored this theme in one of the key sessions at an overnight event for Grace Baptist pastors at High Leigh in March. Leadership should not be about control, he said, but about stimulating, loving, and extending the family. In a generation where young men are regularly failed by the education system, where automation is taking many of their jobs, do pastors understand them? Issues of race, misogyny and gang culture exacerbate the challenge. At the same time, churches need to be places where strong, gifted, and intelligent women are encouraged to flourish. Male leadership that ignores women is both harming them and stunting the growth of the entire church.

Gathering together more than 80 pastors, elders and theological students, the conference covered many themes. Simon Robinson challenged us to think about reaching men, building on his years spent replanting Shepherd Drive Baptist Church in Ipswich. Stéphane Simonnin from Brentford gave a fascinating historical perspective on Calvin’s Company of Pastors. Calvin said: ‘Send us wood and we will send back arrows.’

‘Dig for gold’

Andy Constable from Niddrie Community Church and 20Schemes challenged us to disciple and train non-ministry men, encouraging us to ‘dig for gold in the earth rather than waiting for the cream to rise to the top.’ There was also ministry to the heart from Chola Mukanga and Alan Cartwright.

Five students training for ministry were invited, including Matthew Code from Leatherhead who said: ‘It gave my heart great encouragement to see so many brothers persevering through difficult times, seeking to change the world – even for just one person.’ Jamie Southcombe from Grace Church Guildford said: ‘It was great to get to know new pastors and reconnect with others, to be among like-minded brothers who share a love for the gospel and the church. It was wonderful to sing together.’