School drop-off and pick-up: the same journey, the same scenery, and the same faces. But those faces – was I actually seeing them? The people I'd see twice every weekday, was I actually looking at them?
This initial question led me to wonder: "What if I could look at these people the way Jesus does?"
During our daily walks to and from school, my son and I paid attention. We started to recognise the mother with her two daughters; most of the time, they walked, but sometimes we'd see them on their scooters or cycling. Sometimes they were having animated conversations, and at other times, the girls walked ahead while their mum was deep in thought.
We came across other mums with their kids, and soon they stopped being strangers – they became familiar faces.
Once we got used to looking at and recognising people, we started smiling at them. Soon, we began to say "hello". The greeting was returned.
Then, one mum invited us to the park to play with her daughters. We recognised another mum working at the local shoe shop. I was also able to offer encouragement to a mum who had experienced a difficult pregnancy and whose newborn son had serious health complications.
We were forming connections on our daily walks, and our monotonous routine was beginning to take on colour and light.
Seeing people as Jesus sees them
There were others – those whom we were less inclined to pay attention to. We saw patients from the local psychiatric hospital. There was a man who would start shouting unexpectedly, making us jump and feel scared; we would cross to the other side.
There was also a short, very slim, dishevelled-looking woman who always wore layers upon layers of clothes, making her look bulky and "strange" to our eyes. We'd see a tall woman who'd wear a tutu but never tights – even in winter. Another woman wore layers of make-up and she'd sit with a can of beer in her hand, talking to herself.
Could I see these people as Jesus did? I asked the Lord to help me, and He did.
I started to wonder what had made these people the way they were. I began to imagine the possible backstories behind each of their lives.
Rather than seeing a drunkard, I wondered if the shouting man had actually been fighting for years to stop drinking; perhaps a battle which had begun when his wife had left him, plunging him into a state of despair that was too much to handle by himself. Maybe alcohol was his only respite and ally; perhaps nobody took the time to sit down with him and offer him comfort and support.
Rather than seeing a dishevelled woman, I wondered if she had been abandoned as a child and had then been passed from institution to institution or foster family to foster family. Perhaps she had learned to pack quickly, carrying her possessions with her, never knowing when or where her next refuge would be. Perhaps her sense of abandonment was so profound that it had become impossible to shake off, like a deep-seated cold. I wondered if –no matter how hard she tried to layer herself up with whatever garments she could find – she was unable to keep her heart warm.
Rather than seeing an eccentric lady in a tutu, I wondered if that woman had dreamed of becoming a dancer since childhood, twirling gracefully to her parents’ delight. Maybe she did become a dancer, but an injury at the peak of her career had sent her spiralling into a pit of misery and self-rejection; yet, her passion for dance endured and her tutu reminded her daily of her passion.
Rather than seeing a woman talking to herself, I wondered if she had never had anyone to listen to her talk about her joys, dreams, fears, and questions. Was she desperate for love, belonging, and significance? Perhaps when she talked to herself, she believed that someone might listen.
As I learned to see these people through the eyes of Jesus, I wondered if I could smile at them, too. I did, compelled by the boundless love of Christ.
Learning to look at people and praying for God to help me see them as Jesus does, has transformed my daily routine into a chance to connect with others and build bridges. I want to show them that they are loved and valued.
I pray that, when I smile at them, they can see God’s smile.
