In recent months, there seems to have been an exciting increase in the number of people coming through the front doors of our churches.
It’s so encouraging to see new faces, hear new questions, and see new people becoming regular members of the congregation. But, at the same time, I am hearing an increasing number of stories of people leaving by the back door. Not storming out – not moving away – not finding themselves unable to get to church – but people quietly slipping off to “do church alone”.
These are people who are not giving up their belief in a crucified and risen Saviour, but in the necessity of being in community with others the Lord has saved.
When we hear of people deciding to try “just me, Jesus – and the internet” it is easy to assume that their theology of the church is lacking. And, for some, maybe they have missed God’s corporate call to unity, the privilege it is to be a visible expression of a heavenly reality – they may be unaware of the command to not stop meeting together, and the calls to spur each other on to love and good works. But most people don’t seem to be leaving because they are unaware of what God says about church. And teaching alone is not generally encouraging them to stay. So, why are some people slipping away? Two reasons are dominating my inbox at the moment.
There are those who are leaving the church to pursue a more private expression of faith because they are broken. Maybe they have experienced deep church hurt – maybe they have simply been caught up in a culture of drivenness that has left them exhausted. They try to go it alone because they are feeling like objects not image-bearers, and they fear getting hurt again.
There are probably even more people who are worried about being broken. It’s not that they are necessarily serving lots or involved in any kind of ungodly environment, they might not be serving at all, but they are tired, ground down by the stresses of life, and the simple act of being in an environment that talks about service and asks for a small commitment of time or money means fear kicks in. Maybe church – on top of work and family and fears about global instability – will be the thing that pushes them over the edge.
Fear is a powerful motivator. Fear often nudges people to flee. And in the 21st century there are so many easy places to flee too. Online content offers unlimited teaching – some of it faithful, some offering what itching ears want to hear. Online community offers enthusiastic affirmation – some of it healthy but other bits a far cry from the iron sharpening iron that the diversity of the local church is supposed to embody.
How important then to show the beauty of living in the refuge that is Christ and His community – both through what we teach and how we live. It is as the Shepherd leads His sheep, together, that the Psalm 23 protection, provision, guidance and hope come into view. It is as the community of God shares life as well as teaching, as it did in Acts, that needs are met and people are enabled to serve without drowning. It is as sins are repented of and corporate change sought that the church becomes a refuge from the pain of the past. It is as the church helps each other avoid hollow philosophy, as Paul encouraged the Colossians to do, that fear of the world can begin to subside and confidence to stay connected rises. It is as church models a willingness to be quick to listen that we truly understand why people might be tempted to leave and try to go it alone.
So, let’s be passionate in showing the church to be a place where burdens can be shared – wrongs can be righted – where truth applied to the heart can allay fears – and corporate dependence on Christ breeds resilience, so that people will begin to taste that together is the safest place to be.
