When shame closes doors, love opens them

Jason Roach  |  Features
Date posted:  5 Jul 2025
Share Add       
When shame closes doors, love opens them

Source: Canva

For years, Eleanor slipped into our church services late and left early. She always sat in the back row, always turned down invitations to coffee and her attendance was sporadic at best. When she did come, she kept her head down, rarely making eye contact - many assumed she was just shy or private.

What none of us knew was that Eleanor was carrying a burden of profound shame. Her flat had gradually become overwhelmed with possessions: piles of magazines, bags of clothes, stacks of boxes - until there were only narrow pathways between mountains of items. The situation had deteriorated to the point where it posed genuine health risks, but her shame kept her locked in silence. She felt that if people saw how she lived, they would judge her and think something was wrong with her.

The turning point came when Jane and Mark from our home group gently persisted in their friendship with Eleanor. After months of building trust, they made a breakthrough. They conveyed to Eleanor that their love for her had nothing to do with the condition of her flat, and that nothing she could show them would change that. With trembling hands, Eleanor finally gave them her key.

Share
< Previous article| Features| Next article >
Read more articles by Jason Roach >>
Features
Are you only friends with people like you?

Are you only friends with people like you?

In my experience, eating fish and chips at the seaside can be a life threatening experience. Not because of the …

Features
Crossing cultures as an introvert

Crossing cultures as an introvert

A common concern around welcoming people from different cultures into the local church is that it is impossible for introverts. …

About en

Our vision, values and history

Read more

Looking for a job?

Browse all our current job adverts

Search