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The Narcissism epidemicLiving in the Age of EntitlementHow self-love is sinking our societyTHE NARCISSISM EPIDEMIC My dictionary defines narcissism as the tendency to self worship. The word comes, of course, from the ancient Greek story of Narcissus, the youth who fell in love with his reflection in the water. Thinking about our culture at present, what is the link between the credit crunch, marital breakdown, the quest for infamy and antisocial behaviour among youth, depression, the popularity of YouTube, the prosperity gospel and more? This book argues that it is the rise of narcissism, serious self-love. And we are told that this trend, if unchecked, will threaten the very future of our society. The authors are American academics who have lots of facts and figures up their sleeves. For example, we are informed that young people now have ridiculously unrealistic expectations of themselves which are related to excessive self-love. ‘In 2000, 50% of high school students expected to attend law, medical, dental or graduate school, double the expectations in the 1970s. However, the number of people who actually attain these degrees (that is, a measure of reality) has not changed.’ Granted the data is based on studies in the USA. But with the worldwide reach of electronic media, trends on this side of the Atlantic no longer lag behind those in the US by much. The book is structured in four straightforward sections: the diagnosis, the root causes, the symptoms and the prognosis of what is billed as the narcissism epidemic. The diagnosisWhere did this rise in narcissism come from? It started with such good intentions, say the authors. American culture encourages self-admiration, prompted by the belief that it will improve people’s lives. But often the methods of building self-esteem involved entering the realms of fantasy about ourselves rather than facing reality. The results have turned out ugly. The desire for ‘freedom’ in the 1960s led into the self-absorption and self-indulgence of the 1970s. Once the self was seen as the centre of everything, social beliefs and behaviours changed to fit the new cultural idea of self-admiration. The door was open to the acceptability of a more extraverted, shallow and materialistic form of narcissism. In the 1980s, parents began to raise their children to think highly of themselves and educational practices emphasised self-expression. Churches began to teach that you must love yourself before you can love others. The media began to focus on celebrities more than it had done in the past so that by the 1990s celebrities were covered as mainstream news and everyday people began to seek fame (even if it was infamy) on daytime TV talk shows like Jerry Springer. The internet has taken this to a whole new level, say Twenge and Campbell. Many people are now into broadcasting themselves whenever possible on YouTube and promoting themselves on Facebook and MySpace. The idea that self-admiration per se is beneficial is taken to task very thoroughly in these opening chapters. The authors find themselves in trouble with many people for saying this in a society which has accepted the self-esteem myth of pop psychology. Root causesThis is a secular book which does not interact very much with spiritual values. But, from a Christian point of view, the reason why the self took centre stage was the rejection of God and the flood of secularism during the last 50 years. Without the foundation of God’s love and the constraints of God’s law the needs of the sinful self knew no bounds and the narcissism epidemic has been the result. The book doesn’t see it quite like that. Rather, it explains what has happened in terms of what the reviewer would see as secondary causes. These are changes in parenting, celebrity culture, the internet and easy credit. With the onset of the idea that self-admiration is a good thing, parents began to focus intensely on building their children’s egos. Alongside this went a corresponding demise in their valuing their children’s obedience. Parents behaved as if they were ‘raising royalty’ and the children (surprise, surprise) began to behave as if they were royalty — often of the most unpleasant kind. Using the disease analogy for this ‘epidemic’ of narcissism, the authors see celebrities as being the ‘super-spreaders’ of the sickness. Obviously they are painting with broad brushstrokes and it would be wrong to accuse all celebrities of this. But through gossip magazines, movies, commercials, and reality TV we get a regular infusion of the narcissism virus. We have become a society ‘obsessed with people who are obsessed with themselves’. This sucks others into the disease. ‘A 2006 poll asked children in Britain to name the very best thing in the world. The most popular answer was “becoming famous”. “Good looks” and “being rich” rounded out the top three… ‘God’ came in last.’ Celebrities make narcissism seem cool. With the advent of internet services like YouTube, Facebook and MySpace, this quest for attention is now hugely facilitated. As the artist Andy Warhol predicted back in the 60s now everyone can be famous for 15 minutes. The final chapter in this section tells us that, with the easy credit of the early years of this millennium, many people have been deceived into thinking that they can live the celebrity lifestyle on tick, but have only landed themselves in terrible debt. We are told that not only do individuals live on credit but that whole nations do so as well. ‘The American consumer is just following the lead of the US government, which is currently over $9 trillion in debt, which comes out to roughly $30,000 per citizen.’ The reality principle has been left behind and we live according to the fantasies of our inflated egos. The symptomsThe new drug of choice is the adrenalin rush of being in the spotlight. The symptoms of narcissism are frightening. Among these are vanity, materialism which destroys the environment, always believing that we are special and entitled to the best. In this section the authors deal with the quest for infamy and the rise of incivility. Thorough research is presented which shows that the more narcissistic an individual is the more likely he or she is to be highly aggressive. This is opposite to the popular myth that the more you love yourself the more you will be able to love others. Think of Hitler, Pol Pot, Saddam Hussein or Stalin. ‘Do they strike you as people with low self-esteem?’ ask the authors. This violence spills over not only into school shootings and the like, but also into the use of highly offensive language and the posting of videos of violence among youngsters on the internet (see the recent prosecution of Google in Italy). The church is also shown in many cases to have succumbed to the values of narcissism. One mega-church preacher in particular is cited with his slogan, ‘God didn’t create you to be average’. How many evangelicals have bought into this self-oriented ‘gospel’ without even realising it. Prognosis and treatmentThroughout the book the authors give many ideas for fighting the epidemic of narcissism. They hold out hope, but they also sound grave warnings. What does self-love mean for the future? ‘As long as people continue to be pumped up with false feedback, connected in illusory close relationships (on-line stuff), and driven by flash rather than substance — that is, as long as fantasy can trump reality in the game of life — narcissism will thrive. And as long as narcissism thrives, we can expect a culture that is more and more built on the faulty ground of inflated self-perceptions, shallow relationships, shameless self-promotion, and excessive attention seeking.’ The authors suggest that society may come to its senses and voluntarily draw back from this path, but then go on to give a warning. ‘There is another possibility however… The narcissism epidemic could be reversed during a major economic and social upheaval. The narcissism epidemic itself might cause this social collapse. The financial crisis of 2008 might be only the first step of narcissistic over-confidence bringing down long-established institutions.’ Sign of the times?Reading this book from a Christian point of view, the question is forced upon us ‘who is the most narcissistic person of all — full of conceit and arrogance?’ The answer is surely Satan himself (1 Timothy 3.6). If that is the case, then it seems that we have a modern situation in which, parallel but opposite to the sanctification process which makes Christians more like Christ, there is a power at work to conform much of the world’s population into the image of the devil. What does this say about our times? Is this a sign of the end drawing near and a precursor to the revealing of ‘the man of lawlessness’ (2 Thessalonians 2.8)? On the other hand. perhaps as this epidemic of narcissism increases, the beauty of Christian character will stand out by contrast all the more and draw many to Christ. John BentonI am indebted to Peter Newton, pastor of Mendlesham Green Baptist Church, for © Evangelicals Now - April 2010 |