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One good year of marriageHandle with careONE GOOD YEAR OF MARRIAGE One good year of marriage aims to help marriages that have fallen into unproductive patterns, marriages that are struggling or crumbling. It seeks to enable a couple to reassess their marriage and then to rebuild. The book is designed to be used over the period of a year taking a chapter a month. It is suggested that the husband and wife each appoint a same-sex friend with whom to be accountable and to pray through the issues raised. Each month a chapter is to be read, questions are to be considered and there are various exercises to work through. It is therefore hard to know how fair a review can be given by someone reading the book through, over a short period of time. However, even with that proviso, I have to say that I have some concerns. The major of these being that, for a marriage with any degree of difficulties, some of the issues raised could be used as ammunition by one partner to another, or could raise huge feelings of failure and inadequacy. I feel this could best be guarded against in a very closely monitored situation, by those with much experience and biblical wisdom. Some chapters are well structured and would be very helpful in applying to individual situations. Others, however, seem to be collections of rather disjointed thoughts on a theme. At times the number of questions, lists and assessments seem out of balance with the amount of teaching given. I feel that, unless used with great direction from a mentor, the result could be that some problems are opened up and exposed, but not dealt with. Some of the practical suggestions for activities to do as a couple may have appeal for those living in California, but I'm not convinced they cross the cultural divide, or are even helpful. I confess a number seemed particularly twee or even odd! So does this book have a use? Definitely not for a couple whose marriage is shaky to work through without help. But, perhaps in a pastoral situation, used selectively and with direction, it could achieve its aim of 'challenging a couple to walk into a whole new way of doing marriage'. Julia Jones, © Evangelicals Now - February 2005 |