God's doorman

Have you ever been to a London nightclub? I used to work as a bouncer in nightclubs all over the West End and beyond.

Some of the places were pretty rough. They were clubs where they took drugs and generally partied the night away. Occasionally, big fights would break out and we would have to go in and sort them out.

We were also supposed to stop undesirable people entering. So, as you can imagine, a night of the door-work as we called it, could be tough.

During the day, I used to work as a glazier for Lambeth Council. I would be called in to replace windows that people had broken.

About five years ago, before I became a Christian, I used to live with Crecy, the woman who is now my wife. We have four children, two from her previous marriage and two of our own. At that time, we had been living together for about 12 years.

A very angry lady

What happened? Well, with the job as a bouncer and being a glazier during the day, I was not often at home. I never spent much time with Crecy or with the children. Eventually, bouncing at weekends and glazing during the week, we began to drift apart. In the evenings, I had taken up body-building and would be training down at the gym for two or three hours at a time. I would come home in the evening just as the children were going to bed, and they would be getting up just as I was leaving for work the next morning. I started to do my own thing and Crecy did the same. She would go off to bingo or to the pubs with her friends and I would go to the gym and to nightclubs with my friends and enjoy that.

But growing apart, we ended up separating. I moved out of the house. I used to come back once a week to bring maintenance money for the children and when I came, I would meet a lady, Crecy, who was very angry. She was angry about me leaving her in the lurch. This went on week after week.

Big change

But then something happened. After three or four months, I came home one Friday and there was Crecy standing there and she said she forgives me. I looked at her quite strangely, thinking: 'What do you mean you forgive me? What have I done wrong?' She said she was sorry for the way she had carried on, and I really couldn't believe the change in her attitude towards me.

Anyway, she allowed me to come and see the kids more regularly. And then I found out what was really going on. She had made a commitment to the Lord Jesus Christ. Her brother and sister-in-law, who had been Christians for about a year, had led her to the Lord.

Flipped?

She started to speak to me about Jesus's love for me, and how he cared for me and how he wanted me in his Kingdom. This was hard to take. Actually, I thought she was going mad. I thought she had flipped, because she had changed into a different person, it seemed to me, overnight.

I refused to listen to her. I told her that if Jesus wanted me, he would find me. 'I don't need you to tell me about Jesus,' I said. Who was she to tell me anything? I would tell her to be quiet: 'I don't want to hear!'

Eventually, about four weeks after this initial change, we got back together. I moved back into the home. Then, one Sunday morning, Crecy woke up and said she wanted to go to church. I said: 'I'll look after the children and you can go to church.' No, that was not what she wanted. She needed someone to go with her. So, I said: 'Your Mum lives across the road. Ask her to go with you. She will enjoy the service.' But her mother said that she did not want to go.

God in church

My wife persisted. So, just to keep the peace between us, I said I would go. Just before we went, I told her that I would not sing or anything, I would just sit there. So I went with her to Stockwell Baptist Church.

As I sat in church, one man spoke a bit about missionaries. That was interesting. Being a glazier, I looked at all the lovely stained-glass windows. I thought to myself that if somehow the church ever got vandalised, I might get a nice job here. If my wife knew the pastor, perhaps he would give me the work. With thoughts like that buzzing round in my mind, the pastor got up to preach. He spoke about how people were selfish and self-seeking, out for their own pleasure.

As he got into his talk, what I can only describe as the conviction of God came on me. I felt he was talking to me directly. I felt that all the eyes of the congregation were on me. I wanted a big hole to appear and swallow me up. But at the same time, it was as if somehow I saw a light. It was calling me forward. I listened. I was gripped.

I thought to myself: 'How does this guy know so much about me? Where did he learn all this stuff?' The answer came to me that it was not just him who was speaking to me, it was God!

Overwhelmed

There was no altar call at the end of the service. I went home with Crecy, still pondering what the pastor had said and very much under God's conviction.
I felt overwhelmed. I felt I had to do something. 'Where is your sister-in-law?' I said to Crecy. She was across the road in Mum's house. 'Please go and get her and get her husband,' I found myself saying, 'I want to commit my life to the Lord. I want to give my life over to Jesus.' The things that my wife had said and the things that the pastor had said had started to connect together. I just knew I had to do something about it. So my sister-in-law and her husband came over and they prayed with me. That day I felt the Lord Jesus come into my life.

Two kinds of service

A couple of weeks later, both Crecy and I felt very convicted about our relationship of just living together. We decided that we must honour the Lord and his way. We felt we must get married.

We were not well off, but without knowing where we would get the money, we set a date for our wedding. We just went ahead in faith, continuing to pray about it. Then one morning something came through our letterbox from the postman. To our great joy, we found that a big income tax refund had dropped on our mat. Now we could get married! We praised God!

Since then, our four children have all become Christians and been baptised. We all worship together at Courland Grove Baptist Church in Clapham.

But the Lord has led us further. Both Crecy and I now are in full-time service for the Lord at Clapham. It is a work mainly among young people which we enjoy very much. It is a deprived and difficult area of London, but we praise God that we can serve him in this small way. We rejoice to be able to take the love of God to these needy children.