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 PrintableVersion The challenge of caringWho cares wins?THE CHALLENGE OF CARING A more accurate title for the book would be ‘Reflections on Caring’. It is not about the challenge of caring itself, but stories drawn from the author’s experiences, which she links to biblical stories. She writes honestly and compassionately about some of the negative aspects of caring for an elderly parent, and most of the stories are helpful and encouraging. It is a great pity, therefore, that her chapter on independence reveals a shocking, infantilising view of older people, and a misapprehension of how God views independence. The story is about Anna and Simeon, both quite aged, yet still serving in the temple. They were to see ‘the Lord’s Christ’, as the Holy Spirit had told them, but readers will be surprised to learn that the prophecy was fulfilled ‘not only because they lived close to God but also because their relatives had allowed them the freedom to be themselves, to live as they thought best’ (p.33). I had to look up my Bible to see how I’d missed the relatives. But the point is not about relatives, real or imagined: in the culture of Israel at that time, Anna and Simeon would have been respected and honoured and kept, not by their patronising relatives, but by God who had promised. Older people are autonomous, mature adults who do not need permission from others. Because an adult is in a wheelchair does not mean he has the mind of a child. ‘Independence is part of dignity’ begins the story’s concluding paragraph. But independence is a societal, not a biblical value. Independence says: ‘I don’t need your help’. God tells us to bear one another’s burdens, to love one another as we love ourselves. It is pride that refuses help. Other stories make pleasant reading, though they are best read remembering that this is one person’s highly individual view on each topic. Louise Morse,
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