The chicken sandwich that changed my life

In January 1997, my wife Cathie and I set aside some time to pray about our future.

We do this from time to time, because we believe that disciples of Jesus ought to listen out occasionally to hear further instructions. We prayed through the rest of the winter but it was spring before two friends got in touch with us. Each had heard of a church in the North East of England that was looking for a pastor and both sent us some of the bumph they had produced to describe what they are looking for.

As soon as I saw what Bethany Church in Houghton-le-Spring was looking for I knew that this was it. At that stage it was quite subjective, and I didn't know the church at all, but there was no question that deep in my spirit I knew this was it. Evangelical Christians are rightly cautious about subjective feelings. How do we tell whether they are from the Lord or from that bit of undigested cheese down there in your small intestine? Yet feelings are important clues that need following up.

Meeting the leaders

After a few days thought I contacted the church and asked if we could meet. This proved significant. Most of the leaders of Bethany had heard me preach before either at a local Gideons meeting or at Keswick. Some of them felt that they should approach us to consider working with them but because they had the impression (quite rightly) that we were happy in Leicester they felt we would not consider a move and so were slow to get in touch.

So I went up to Houghton-le-Spring in May and spent an evening with the elders. Here was a church with a Brethren history which had outgrown its own building. Now about 200 people were meeting in a school, and putting up a new and ambitious building nearby, which is to be the Bethany Christian Centre, part church, part sports facility, a place to meet and reach out to the local community. Yet almost half the congregation come from further afield: Sunderland, Durham or other towns round about. Fast roads and a mobile population make the church's catchment area very wide, and its potential influence in a needy region huge. They were people with vision and love, looking for a pastor.

Face-to-face with leaving

Driving home from Houghton I came face to face with the possibility of leaving Knighton. It was no longer a theory but harsh reality. I could see myself working in Houghton, but the possibility of leaving our spiritual family at Knighton filled me with sadness. So I chickened out. On the way home I framed a letter which I typed before I went to bed, I had thought of two plausible-sounding reasons to say no. I thought that was the end of that.

That was before I ate the chicken sandwich that changed my life.

In June I had a phone call from David, one of the elders at Bethany. He explained that they had been seeing various people and seeking God about their need but kept coming back to Cathie and myself. They suggested we get together and talk. The way he put it was this: 'Either we have got our guidance wrong or you have'. It was a good point powerfully put, so we agreed to meet.

A living reality

David and his brother Peter met Cathie and I in a hotel in Leicester over a pot of coffee and a plate of chicken sandwiches. We hit it off straight away and a few days later Cathie and I decided that the best thing to do was go up to Houghton and worship in the church there and see what happened. This we did during our holiday in July. Again, we hit it off with the church, and began to see and catch the vision for what they are trying to do.

Looking back, this was a critical moment in the guidance process. A church that we had read about in bits of paper, and talked about in an analytical way, was now a living reality and we felt that this was home. Cathie and I have always believed that if you are going to serve on the full time staff of a church it ought to be the kind of fellowship you would chose to worship with if you were in an ordinary job and living nearby. Bethany was just right for us and the children. Another fundamental I believe is that Christian ministry is most effective when done by teams of people who love and trust each other. The potential for deep friendships is basic to the decision about a pastor moving churches. This personal contact with people established that the friendships were already forming, we left Houghton-le-Spring knowing that they were a people we could love and work with.

Les miserables

The following week was miserable. Under deep conviction that this was undoubtedly what the Lord was telling us to do, we still felt wretched about leaving the church at Knighton, didn't want to leave our special friends here, and didn't want to uproot the kids. After many tears and night after night without sleep our objections were put aside one-by-one. We were left with a straightforward issue of Christian discipleship, would we obey the Lord's leading, and would we trust him with our family's needs and with the church? We contacted Bethany again and set up a date to spend the weekend with them.

At this point (mid July) we brought the elders at Knighton into the frame (we had already discussed it with the other staff in the church), explaining exactly what was going on. We also wrote to a number of special friends asking them to pray with us as we made this crucial decision. Now, to cut a long story short, because you've guessed the rest, we went to Houghton for a weekend in early September and, as a result of being officially invited, we have accepted.

The Knighton elders were very helpful, they asked good questions but resisted the temptation to put us under pressure (either way!). Some of them and their wives took the time for more searching and careful conversations. This was a painful and sad time, explaining to good friends why you have decided to leave them and go to work with others. Yet it was the quality of the Knighton leadership and the strength of the current staff team that gave Cathie and I the freedom to think about leaving in the first place. All our conversations confirmed that we were leaving the fellowship in good hands. Now I know how Paul felt when he left Ephesus (Acts 20).

Men under orders

Yet for Cathie and myself the bottom line was a question of Christian discipleship. Would we or would we not obey the Lord? Something Herbert Carson said when I shared the news with him sums all this up. 'We are men under orders', he said. I believe this is true, and the dawning of that fact came in a hotel room in Leicester over the one chicken sandwich that I managed to eat during our meeting with David and Peter.

'Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your paths' (Proverbs 3.5,6).

Guidance

Meeting the leaders

Face-to-face with leaving

A living reality

Les miserables

Men under orders

David Burke

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