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Did you hear the one about...?

Anyone heard a sermon recently on justice and mercy? Featuring the senior lady sitting for her portrait? ‘I expect you to do me justice’, she says to the artist. ‘What you need, madam, is not justice but mercy!’ Ho, ho; pompous old bat gets come-uppance from smart bloke.

Christopher Idle

There is another way of telling it. Here the portrait-painter says, ‘Madam, I’ll try to do you justice’. She answers, ‘What I need, young man, is not justice but mercy!’ Spot the difference; realistic grandma corrects obsequious male — with style.